"I'm not just drunk, I'm Unmanned!"

We, the people of the Cult of The SHAFT, in order to obtain a more perfect state of enlightenment, sometimes find it helpful to get a good buzz on. Many days of ritual beatings are followed by nights of downing large quantities of brightly colored fruity drinks meant to dull the pain.

Of course, The SHAFT often manifests ITself on these evenings in the form of drinks that taste horrible and unsettle the stomach. More than one brave Knight of The SHAFT has fallen to the power of the Inquisition's powerful concoctions.

It should be noted that not all of The SHAFT's followers indulge in this particular ritual. Many gain enjoyment from watching the goings on, and someone must remain stable in order to take advan... I mean, ensure that everyone makes it back to their respective abodes.

Disclaimer: The SHAFT does not allow minors to consume any substance which they may not legally consume. The SHAFT also encourages everyone to worship responsibly. Remember, ritual imbibing of brightly colored fruity drinks and driving don't mix.